And then I became annoyed...

I know I've vented about this a lot to my family (and poor Darren has heard more than his fair share of it), but I've still got some venting left to do.

I am having a baby.

Presumably, the baby will be born at a healthy weight and size.

One way or another, it will exit my body.

My chosen method of delivery is the age old way of going into labor and squirting that puppy out, sans epidural.

"OMG, are you crazy?!"

"You are SO going to change your mind!"

"Hahahahahahahahahahaha you've never had a baby before, have you?"

To any and all naysayers, I have this to say: I can't heeeear yoooou.

A little support would be nice?

Now, I don't remember who all has ever said anything like this to me, so if you are reading this and think you are guilty, don't get all embarrassed and think that I hate you. Remember, I have pregnancy brain, and hold no personal ill-will because I can never remember who actually deserves it. So don't sweat it! =)

My grudge is against the you-can't-do-it mentality.

Reasons I feel like birthing without an epidural is the right choice for ME:

1. It feels the most natural and complication free. I have a lifetime of avoiding medicine at most costs, so that isn't new to me.  I tend to ride headaches out and always have. Typically medicine is employed when it begins to interfere with sleeping (sleep is sacred). Even then I take the lower dosages available.
2. Needles terrify me.  I don't care how many women have experienced an epidural and been just fine. I don't care how painless it is. I don't care how relieving it is. I refuse to cope with the idea of sitting still during labor, while a 20 ft long needle enters my spine with the object of deadening sensation, thereby removing my agency to move around or work with and through my labor pains. Thanks, but no thanks.
3. I want the satisfaction of knowing I beat seemingly impossible odds. My grandchildren will probably never refer to me as being a great risk taker, but when a challenge strikes me hard enough, you can't stop me.  That is why I trained and complete my first half-marathon.  It was something I just needed to do to prove something to myself. Not to world, but to myself. If I had wanted to prove much to the world I would have tried to win that race, but I was racing myself.  It is hard to describe.  The notion of delivering naturally has hit me that same way, so believe me, I will be ready.

Granted, I know that birth plans don't always play out as desired.  I understand that. However, I am shooting for the optimal experience for me. That way I know that I will have tried.

I liken it to a wedding vs a marriage.  One is the kick-off, and even if the day doesn't go exactly as planned, there is no reason to let that cast a gloom over the marriage. I know that delivering a baby is just a beautiful glimmer in the timeline of that baby's existence. 

No matter how it all goes down, I will be happy to hold a healthy baby girl in a few months.