D&C 51:16-17, 19
“And I
consecrate unto them this land for a little season, until I, the Lord, shall
provide for them otherwise, and command them to go hence;
“And the
hour and the day is not given unto them, wherefore let them act upon this land
as for years, and this shall turn unto them for their good.
“And whoso
is found a faithful, a just, and a wise steward shall enter into the joy of his
Lord, and shall inherit eternal life.”
I promise I'm not as "spiritual" as these last couple of posts might make me seem. I'm not trying to be obnoxious and self-righteous. I just have some thoughts I want to share, and putting them on my blog feels way less obnoxious than putting them on Facebook haha
I love these
scriptures found in Section 51 of the Doctrine and Covenants, where the Lord
said He has consecrated a place to them for a little season, but He commands
them to make the most of it. To “act upon” it as if they’re going to be there
for many years. I’ve noticed many seasons of my life when I haven’t been sure
if I should plant roots or just hang out. I distinctly remember accepting that
my teenage dream of escaping Southeast Texas was not going to happen. I can
recall transitioning from anxious limbo to a new resolve to make the most of my
time there. I didn’t know if I would ever leave, but I knew that then was not
the time to do so. I felt called to make the most of everything being offered
and learn to experience joy. I grew relationships, served in the church,
attended Institute classes, and learned through many good and great and
terrible experiences. Those are the years where I grew into the “me” that would
eventually marry, have kids, and yes, move away from Southeast Texas.
These verses hit differently tonight. I’m kicked back, stretching my body so that the coconut feeling womb inside of me has space to not feel squished. I’m a third of the way into my seventh pregnancy, and I’ve spent the last 3 months adding the same caveat to nearly every statement I’ve made regarding the pregnancy’s outcome: “If this baby lives…”. I know there are no guarantees in pregnancy, and the prideful side of me is so afraid of being caught a fool. Like, if I don’t acknowledge that this pregnancy could fail, I’m going to look real stupid. But that’s not true.
As it is, I’ve accidentally taught my children to express the same lack of faith. As the one who taught them to say, “If this baby lives…”, I’m trying to make a more concerted effort to use more affirming statements and to talk about the future. I mean, can you imagine having that attitude after the baby is born? I’m painfully aware that tomorrow isn’t promised for anyone. But that doesn’t stop us from having dreams for the future. It doesn’t stop us from encouraging our children to imagine their futures. We don’t say, “If you live to be a certain age, you can drive too!” We simply dream it with them. Sometimes those dreams are snatched through their untimely death. But I think that even then, the default for most is to assume that their futures on earth exists.
I have not been called as a fortune teller or a seer. I’ve not been called to guess what the future has in store and try to brace myself against whatever tragedy I’m imagining. I’ve been called to raise a family. During this season, which is of unknown duration, I’ve been called to grow a baby, and I believe that Heavenly Father and Christ want me to view this experience through that lens which says, “This is where I am, and this is my calling. I am going to make the most of it and have joy.” I believe they want me to be a faithful, just, and wise steward of all of my children in their various developmental stages.
I believe they want
me to remove myself from the proverbial flower pot, plant myself in the ground,
and experience growth that can only be achieved by completely submitting myself
to the process and allowing my roots space for expansion.
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